the crazed midget man
by kasia matsubishi
Summary: my friend razz, kurama, and hiei and donuts this summary suxs but i reccomend you read this because it is so funny
1. it begins

A/n hello I am posting this for my friend razz who cannot get on her computer and plus I, I thought it was funny for future reference my name will be Kasia in this story and my friend is terrazzo or razz BEWARE IF YOU DO NOT LIKE PROFANITY THEN THIS IS NOT THE STORY FOR YOU. Oh and this is a NON YAOI STORY no offense to yaoi fans but I just don't like 't like yaoi neither does my friend right now she is having trouble finding a non yaoi picture of hiei and kurama

Disclaimer: razz nor I own yuyu hakasho if we did we would keep kurama and hiei and gladly give you yusuke and kuwabara because kuwabara is an idiot and yusuke is to loud.

Chapter1: The Crazed Midget Man

I awoke to the blinding light of the sun shining through my bedroom

window.

Razz: "Who the hell opened the damn window?"

Kurama: "I did, but there are more important things to worry about!"

Razz: "It's to f**king early!" 

Kurama: "It's 1 o'clock in the afternoon!"

Razz: "Fine god*amnit, I'll wake up."

After I go through the "Wake up" routine, Which is to be done in the morning, I walk into the kitchen to have my usual cup of coffee {with a doughnut or two}.

Razz: "What the f**k!!!!!!"

To my surprise I found 9 huge, empty cans of coffee and 6 empty boxes of doughnuts Sprawled all over the floor.

Razz: "What the hell happened in here!?!"

Kurama: "Hiei happened." {Hands me note}   
  
  
  
Sorry about the mess Razz, I was hungry. you were right coffee is GREAT!!!!! I have gone to get some more heaven, I mean doughnuts.

I shall return,

Hiei   
  
  
  
  
  
  


Razz: "Oh goody, that's great!!!!"[Sarcastically]

Kurama: "You're gonna love this!"{He says sarcastically, motioning me to look at the T.V.}   


Reporter: "We are here live at The Doughnut Shop, where only moments ago, what witnesses call, a crazed midget man attacked the cashier demanding all the doughnuts."   
  
  
  
  


Razz: "Holy shit!!!!! What have I created!!!!!! I never should have suggested coffee and doughnuts to Hiei!!!"

Kurama: "Quiet, there's more."   
  
  
  
  


Reporter: "There are police surrounding Dunkin Doughnuts and The Doughnut Shak in hopes of catching the crazed midget man. We will bring you any further updates."{Goes into commercials}

  
  
  


Razz: "Kurama, you let him go!!!! Kuwabara had a stash in one of those coffee cans!!!!!"

Kurama: "Kuwabara!?!

Razz: "Yes, infact it is crack cocaine."

Kurama: "And I always thought he was a nice guy. Not nice looking, but a nice personality."

Razz: "We have to find him before the god*amn police do!!!"   
  
  


Reporter: "Finally after hours of waiting, the police now, sort of, have the crazed midget man in custody. [people screaming in background][behind the reporter you can see Hiei gnawing on a police officers leg]   
  
  


Kurama: "I think we may be a little late."

Razz: "No shit, Einstein!!!!!"


	2. the money fairy

A/n hi again umm this chapter has ME in it YAY!! I AM THE MONEY FAIRY!!! *Hands money to all so everyone can buy out all the sugar stores in the usa* just as an extra for all to know i am botans distant cousin

Disclaimer once again WE DO NOT OWN YUYU HAKUSHO!! DO YOU GET THAT!! YOU CAN'T SUE US!!! And even if you did all you would get is umm *****rummages pockets*** **some lint and 3 empty candy bar wrappers na na *sticks tongue out* 

Chapter2: The Money Fairy

Razz: "Hiei, what the hell were you thinking!!!????!"

[Hiei gnaws at cell door]

Kurama: "Hiei, that's not good for your teeth."

Razz: "Alright then, Mr. Hygiene, you can leave now.

Kurama: "Fine then if you don't want my help I'll just leave then."[Kurama pretends to cry]

As he walks off [pretending to be sad] I hear the familiar "BINGO, BINGO, BINGO. Yes it was!!! Kasia screaming bingo at the top of her lungs.

Razz: "The sound of money, isn't it nice."

Hiei: "Huh!?!?!?! DOUGHNUTS!?!?!?!?!"

Razz: Helloooo, Kasia!!!!!! Could I maybe, possibly borrow some money to bail dumbass over there?

Kasia: "Hmmmm, let me think.................................................OK, but only on one condition!

Razz: "Alright, what is it?

Kasia: "You'll have to get me a certain "Fluffy".

Razz: You mean my cousin, Sesshoumaru?

Kasia: "BINGO!!!!!! YES, YES, YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You've won the million dollar prize!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Razz: "Goody, Goody!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now hand it over."

Kasia: "What's the magic word?"

Razz: "I'll tell you the magic words, Hand over the damn money!!!!"

Kasia: "Fine here! [Hands over the money] I want Fluffy by high noon tomorrow!"

With those final words she skipped off screaming BINGO, BINGO, BINGO!!!!!!!!! I GET THE FLUFF BOY, I GET THE FLUFF BOY!!!!!!!!!

Razz: "What the hell is high noon!?!?!"

Hiei: "It's Doughnut, o, clock."{Just for the record Hiei only got high two times.

Razz: "Lucky for you Hiei, the money fairy came.

Hiei: "You know if you look at the pretty stars long enough they move!"

Razz: "Huh!?!?!?"   
  



	3. kasia's dream come true

A/n hi!!! I can't wait my one dream comes true in this chappy you'll have to read and see.

Disclaimer: I'm sure your getting tired of hearing this no we don't own yuyu hakusho this goes for all chappys 

Chapter3: Kasia's Dream Come True

Fluffy: "Why is that pathetic mutt doing here? I thought you were going to talk to me, and me alone. You never mentioned him [gestures towards Inuyasha].

Inuyasha: "Who are you calling a pathetic mutt, you scumbag!!!!

Razz: "Shut the hell up, you two!!!!!!! You both are acting like f**king children!!!!!!!!!

Inuyasha: "I don't have time for this!!!!!! I have jewel shards to find."[Inuyasha walks off into the woods.]

Fluffy: I'm leaving now, if you don't mind.

Razz: "Yes I mind!!!!"

Fluffy: "Well make it quick."

Razz: "The money fairy wanted me to give you this."

Fluffy: {Sesshoumaru takes the box and begins to open it} "Who did you say?"

Razz: "Never mind."

Fluffy: "What is this strange white robe?"

Razz: "A very special one." {I began tying the sleeves behind his back}

Fluffy: "What are you doing?"

Razz: "Tying it"

Fluffy: "Behind my back?! Hey wait a minute!!!!!!!"

Before he realized what I was doing, it was too late.

Fluffy: "Damn you, Terrazzo!!!"

Before long Kasia came skipping along screaming bingo.

Kasia: "I see you've managed to get him in the straight jacket.

Fluffy: [horrified] "You're that freak that mauled me the other day!!!!! Razz how could you hand me over to this horrible beast?!?!"

Razz: "Let's see, I don't know? Maybe it's the fact I don't like you."

I turn away as Kasia drags him off. I completely ignored his cries for help. It didn't matter anyway, they were soon drowned out by Kasia's piercing voice.

Kasia: "I've got the fluff boy, I've got the fluff boy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Come, Sesshoumaru, Come!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   
  
  
  
  



End file.
